soft touch quantum horsemanship -the mind-body connection horse or human
A
Beautiful Thank You Letter
I came to
Horse Holiday as a child:
It’s not that I was a child, it’s just
that the child in me had always wanted to ride and
own a horse.
What I left with was much more than I would
have ever believed could happen; on the back of a
horse things can become amazingly clear.
The bridge to inner healing had been
identified and crossed; my child could now relax
and enjoy.
Rose
assigned me to a grand horse named Jubilee.
Jubilee is very wise and knows
instinctively the pain as well as the person he
carries a top him.
He taught me step by step how to trust him
and myself.
Rose used to tell me that he loved to hear
me laugh; I guess it was years of pent up child
laughter just waiting these precious moments to
reveal itself.
The night I
will never forget is the fall evening and that
Jubilee and I were to do ‘survival.
The sun was setting and the evening was
growing chilly cold.
Rose told me I must maneuver Jubilee a
certain was because of an emergency.
Of course Jubilee being very wise, did
exactly opposite of what I wanted him to do.
Conflict broke loose and frustrations rose.
“Why am I doing this to myself”
I asked.
As the evening air became even chillier, I
thought I must be crazy for bringing this
purposeful act upon myself.
As I sat a top Jubilee whining that I just
couldn’t get him to do what I wanted, a very
poignant picture came to my mind.
It was so real, I could feel the emotions.
I saw a little girl (me) in an argument
with her mother.
And of course, mother usually won and the
little girl usually left feeling unloved,
humiliated, and angry/
Jubilee knew somehow, that I needed to
cross this bridge of healing so I could move on.
I resisted fiercely.
I whined to Rose that Jubilee just wouldn’t
do what I asked him to do.
The child
just couldn’t resist mom because she
never could win the argument and the love
together.
It was always a loose.
On my mind was a phone call from my mom
that I was expected to be at Thanksgiving dinner
later that week.
The child was very angry.
Show up and get love, but be angry that mom
still is in control, or say no and face the
silence and the withdrawal.
Either way, the child looses again.
I finished
the course miserably that night, but the bridge
had not been crossed and healing had not
begun.
I took Jubilee to the barn, and I seriously
thought I would never come back again.
Why was Rose so nosey?
Of course I’m frustrated, of course I
feel like I had no control!!
However Rose saw the bridge, and so,
that moonlit night, Jubilee and I set out again
for another pasture to try to cross one more time.
Jubilee tried to walk over a grave of one
of his friends; it was like telling me that the
stuff I had been carrying will be the death of me.
I listened to him,
I felt his breathing (we were bareback) and
the warmth of his body, and I took in the night.
I announced to the night that I would
cross and not be afraid anymore.
And so we did.
I later took
Jubilee to the barn and spent an hour just
brushing and feeding him.
I almost felt as if the conditional love I
had forfeited was being returned in a different
way.